10,000 Reasons {to Choose Joy}

Four Years ago today there was this awful, terrible day sandwiched right between two equally as terrible days. Dad left us on May 10th, and actually died officially on May 12th. Anyway, May 11th was spent filled with hope, yet also the sinking feeling of knowing there was none. No hope for the prayers I was screaming to be answered in that moment, or in the way that I would have written the story. 

But there is a song on my heart, and I am clinging to it this week. 

Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I worship Your holy name

You see, God was with me that hopeful/hopeless day, and the terrible awful day before, and the gut-wrenchingly painful day after, and all the days since.

The sun comes up; it's a new day dawning
It's time to sing Your song again
Whatever may pass and whatever lies before me
Let me be singing when the evening comes

The sun does come up. And there is a song to sing. Because our God is Great. He is present no matter what. Whatever happened on that horrible mountain on the worst ever Mother's Day, and whatever is to come, God remains Holy, and loving, and present. 

You're rich in love and You're slow to anger
Your name is great and Your heart is kind
For all Your goodness, I will keep on singing
10,000 reasons for my heart to find

So today, I CHOOSE to sing. To sing God's song of pure joy. Even in the pain, there is the ability to choose Joy and to keep on singing to my good God. The 10,000 reasons are there, you just have to look harder to find them some days. 


And on that day when my strength is failing
The end draws near and my time has come
Still my soul will sing Your praise unending
10,000 years and then forever more

And the thing about choosing to sing is that hope returns. Because God is Hope, and worshiping our Holy Father blesses even through tears and heart ache. He turns that pain into joy and blesses our willing souls.

Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I worship Your holy name

Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I worship Your holy name
I worship Your holy name
I worship Your holy name

God, even today, when the pain feels new again, I choose to worship your Holy Name.